Some Gratitude - Finally!

Day 545.

I finally got my first western riding lesson.

To be amongst horses and riding again was very special.

On the way to the stables I momentarily felt the urge to slip into sorrow as I drove to the area where, seven years ago, I searched for a livery for Pluto, Luke’s beloved horse - in the thought that we may bring him here, to the US with us.

I felt the dip towards “Oh Luke, you should be with me” as the tears cascaded down my cheeks once more. The heavy sense of falling down the chute of loss.

And then I caught myself.

And so, as I drove in, at one with my loss - I forgot all my grief. Zipping on my boots, I was home.

Bonzai, the pony, was a far cry from the extraordinary and beautiful beasts we had known. But he was sweet, and forward going. The cheeky nature and testing, all there, as he tested me over and over, and I won. I sensed Luke sitting on the fence, laughing at me and at once felt him in me. Memories of a past life of equine immersion all running through my quickening pulse.

I haven’t ridden that well in years, or ever! I hosed Bonzai down afterwards and I was like a pig in shit. Full of joy and in the moment for the first time since Luke died.

Yes, animals heal us, but horses are, to me, extra magical. I feel good, really good.

There’s something to give gratitude for! - Finally!

So is my cure horses? I’m thinking that it is.